© Copyright 2016 Avi Nardia & Aleksandra Nardia w/Tim Boehlert

Teach your students by failing them and show them the reality of what violence really is. Teach them that there are no problems without solutions. Do so not by developing their ego and self-confidence, or by allowing them to fall prey to their own inferiority complex from someone that sees himself as a victim by buying into silly marketing agendas like: “Don’t be a victim!”, or “touch me and your first lesson is free” Don’t paint him a nice view of success through choreographic moves that have nothing to do with reality. He may only develop his ego and false confidence by buying into all of these egotistic slogans and end up walking around like too many do with cool T-shirts but risking his peace and life by looking for problems.

Here’s a short story to help convey what I mean:

One day a king invited two painters to paint his picture. The first completed a very realistic picture of the king seated on his chair and painted the king including his disabilities. You see the king was disabled with one blind eye, and missing one leg! The king got so mad that he sentenced the painter to prison!

The second painter painted the king as he rode upon a fine horse befitting a king. The painting depicted the king only from the one side showing his remaining leg, shooting his bow as he aimed with one eye closed (yes, the blind eye!) The king was so happy that he  paid him a large sum of money!

This is the talent of having a ‘good eye’: able to see the disabilities and yet make them appear as an advantage.

As a teacher I see it in many classes and work around my students’ disabilities: mental physical, spiritual and help them to become stronger by paying attention to the details as we say the devil is in the details and showing them the mechanism that can work for them personally. Because behind the generic body each of us builds differently and needs different adjustments specific to each of them. This is why feedback to each student may be important and is part of the training portion that I call ‘story-time.’

Some say “the sky is the limit” when what’s really true is that the ground is the limit and this is why I like teach ground and BJJ and Jiujutsu whats better than be locked on ground and in corner near wall to explore – Confined place.

Some time we need Risk your life to make life but training must be always safe – Today I see many Charlatans claim as formers special forces teaching un safe using load gun to teach gun disarming and   Many un safe training that as former top unit in Israel I know these guys never been in any special force and maybe been soldiers but for  sure never instructors as anyone that bern on service know and aware how much safety is first and last rule.

Defense mechanism
2. Reaction formation is the fixation in consciousness of an idea, affect, or desire that is opposite to a feared unconscious impulse. A mother who bears an unwanted child, for example, may react to her feelings of guilt for not wanting the child by becoming extremely solicitous and overprotective to convince both the child and herself that she is a good mother.

Personality: Freud

…of those drives. Other methods of defense include repression, a kind of withholding of conflicting ideas from recall; projection, the attribution to others of one’s own rejected tendencies; and reaction formation, turning into its opposite a tendency rejected in oneself—as in excessive generosity as a defense against avarice. The basic conflict between drives and control processes,…

http://www.britannica.com/topic/defense-mechanism#ref195658

Reaction formation

http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Reaction_formation

http://changingminds.org/explanations/behaviors/coping/reaction_formation.htm

http://study.com/academy/lesson/reaction-formation-in-psychology-definition-example.html

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reaction_formation

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/hide-and-seek/201203/why-people-are-so-often-the-opposite-what-they-appear

Watch out from In psychoanalytic theory, reaction formation (German: Reaktionsbildung) is a defensive process (defense mechanism) in which emotions and impulses which are anxiety-producing or perceived to be unacceptable are mastered by exaggeration (hypertrophy) of the directly opposing tendency.[1][2]The reaction formations belong to Level III or neurotic defense mechanisms, which also include intellectualization, dissociation, displacement and repression.

The concept of reaction formation has been used to explain responses to external threats as well as internal anxieties. In the phenomenon described as Stockholm Syndrome, a hostage or kidnap victim ‘falls in love’ with the feared and hated person who has complete power over them. Similarly paradoxical reports exist of powerless and vulnerable inmates of Nazi camps creating ‘favourites’ among the guards and even collecting objects discarded by them. The mechanism of reaction formation is often characteristic of obsessional neuroses. When this mechanism is overused, especially during the formation of the ego, it can become a permanent character trait. This is often seen in those with obsessional character and obsessive personality disorders. This does not imply that its periodic usage is always obsessional, but that it can lead to obsessional behavior.

The more you take the less you have.

What I’m looking for in a Kapap Israeli Krav Maga leader: At this point, what I look for in a self-defense instructor is a human being who knows how to exist and thrive on this planet, a spiritual warrior. He/she also needs to understand my unique point of awareness to life and have the ability to lead, but not to use it for his own ego.

Self-preservation starts within the mind. I look up to educators that not only know techniques, clear concepts of fighting and effective escapes, but who touch on philosophy and psychology of violence and conflict communication. On top of it all, they MUST be happy.

I have great respect for people who can communicate their wisdom in a way that I respect and retain. It usually goes hand-in-hand with personal experience and being AWAKE!

I always watch to see how teachers conduct themselves. I look for humility and accountability. And then, I look at GENEROSITY. This is why I set 4 levels first as eligibility into my Kapap program as most will never manage to pass this simple test first. THAT is always what makes my decision. Anything that I learn from this person will touch many lives, so I look for it to be a POSITIVE model.

I’m looking for a person who considers inner peace and balance priorities as a human being. Someone who has taken a deep long look into the dark side and not only DEALT with it, but understands it profoundly, accepts it, and responds to it in reality, without judgment.

These people are mentors, LEADERS and teach and spread the word of Kapap Israeli Krav Maga.

© Copyright 2016 Avi Nardia & Aleksandra Nardia w/Tim Boehlert

Outside is better Relative Position than Inside for self-defense.

Zarathustra was a smart and wise character created by Friedrich Nietzsche, the German philosopher, in his writings who tried to bring awareness to humans and to open their eyes, but no one understood his words. He understood that he was ahead of his time and that the world was not ready for him yet…

The name Nikola Tesla is a great example of a man that was ahead of his time. Only in the last few years has his name gained recognition. Tesla is now known for his work with electricity, his radio patents and many other ideas that demonstrate his genius, a man truly ahead of his time. Many now benefit from his ideas and inventions and patents.

“It is hard to give unlimited power to limited minds.” Nikola Tesla

I was talking to a friend and great Martial Artist, a young talent, tell me that he joined my Sensei Hanshi Patrick McCarthy  workshop and that at last he could really understand. It made me understand that sometimes teachers may lose their students and forget that their students do not have the proper tools, knowledge or wisdom. As we try  to push them, they need more basics and knowledge that may appear to be common sense. It’s important to teach that and as we say “slow is fast.” When we teach too fast we may lose the students by using martial arts terms that they don’t understand enough to understand our meaning. When teaching conceptual martial arts it’s harder to teach and study than just teaching techniques. When you understand a technique you know a technique and when you understand a concept you know endless  techniques.

Masters have unfair advantage over most people – they were willing to fail, but tried anyway. 

Most people do not even wish to try to get their own White Belt’s because their ego prevents them from doing so,  but they instead prefer to take weekend ‘Master Certification’ programs in Military uniforms from YouTube ‘Masters” ex Solider  – Rambo. ‘Keep this in perspective: a White Belt is a higher level of learning than people sitting on a couch watching the video will ever achieve! It demonstrates their respect and willingness to study from a real Sensei.

In combat we have 3 dimensions:  front, back and side. We also have 3 ways you can move: forward, backward or to the side. We can only react in 3 ways: linearly, circularly or in a trianglular fashion and these compose Kapap’s ‘relative position’ concept. We use relative position to the aggressor and situational awarness which also includes use and awareness of the environment.

The best relative position is to not be there!  Avoid the fight! If we can’t escape, the next best relative position would be to be at the aggressors back or to his side. A bad relative position would be to stand in front of him, as he would then have all of his ‘tools’ to hit you with:  legs, knees, elbows, head, body and  hands. That’s why we always need to try and get to his blind-side where we can better control his center and creating ‘The Guard’ – Kamae in Japanese. It’s also the BEST position for us to strike and defend from.

Also in some situations we can’t  move backward but must stand fast and we’d need to know how to transfer our force against him and control him from the side or from his back.

As a combat and self-defense system this must be our first step, our prefered goal: to be ‘outside’ his body and not ‘inside’ his body. ‘Inside’ his body when discussing relative position means that you are in between his hands and legs and it also means that he can hit you the as same as you can hit him, and the stronger man will win. But, if you by step to the outside of his body you have the advantage of levarage and control of his body center and gain more power! It’s really an important issue in self defense. We assume we are not as strong as our aggressor and thus we must take advantage at any point in the process where we can that we will gain us more the advantage of creating more power. That’s why we prefer the outside or the ‘shadow-blind’ side and not the inside, between his arms. We also need to study dealing with the inside but as a secondary priority, for those times when there is no way to move to the outside.

If you choose to only fight from the inside, he may counter your moves and gain the advantage over you. You can gain advantage by using the unexpected – relative position is just such a concept. Using relative position in relation to your adversary means gaining advantage by using your special knowledge and training to end the conflict in your favor. Placing your body and thus your ‘weapons systems’ to his detriment automatically gains you the upper hand. He is now struggling with adjusting to an uncomfortable feeling – a situation for which he is not familiar, odd angles, closer proximity perhaps, and his mind will lag behind as he tries to adjust to an unfamiliar situation.

You have changed his attack to your advantage by using a different tactic than what he may have ever anticipated, or ever trained for. You now have his mind engaged and distracted enough to gain you time – a very good prospect. His mind is now reeling. He won’t be able to catch up to you IF you take advantage NOW, and stop his aggression, by using your own to stop him. By going to his side, or to his back, you have taken away his ‘sight’, his focus. He is now working hard to catch up to the new positioning, and has to slow down to comprehend those changes, evaluate and respond – which gives you many new options.

In Kapap we also use the ‘Rule PLUS One’ concept: If he has a gun, he may also have a knife. You will need to keep an open-mind, and always expect the unexpected. Never assume anything about a conflict – all things are possible, and those aspects and possibilities that you don’t account for will not be to your advantage, but to his.

You can lead a human to knowledge, but you can’t make him think. 

© Copyright 2016 Avi Nardia & Tim Boehlert