© Copyright 2016 Avi Nardia & Aleksandra Nardia w/Tim Boehlert
Teach your students by failing them and show them the reality of what violence really is. Teach them that there are no problems without solutions. Do so not by developing their ego and self-confidence, or by allowing them to fall prey to their own inferiority complex from someone that sees himself as a victim by buying into silly marketing agendas like: “Don’t be a victim!”, or “touch me and your first lesson is free” Don’t paint him a nice view of success through choreographic moves that have nothing to do with reality. He may only develop his ego and false confidence by buying into all of these egotistic slogans and end up walking around like too many do with cool T-shirts but risking his peace and life by looking for problems.
Here’s a short story to help convey what I mean:
One day a king invited two painters to paint his picture. The first completed a very realistic picture of the king seated on his chair and painted the king including his disabilities. You see the king was disabled with one blind eye, and missing one leg! The king got so mad that he sentenced the painter to prison!
The second painter painted the king as he rode upon a fine horse befitting a king. The painting depicted the king only from the one side showing his remaining leg, shooting his bow as he aimed with one eye closed (yes, the blind eye!) The king was so happy that he paid him a large sum of money!
This is the talent of having a ‘good eye’: able to see the disabilities and yet make them appear as an advantage.
As a teacher I see it in many classes and work around my students’ disabilities: mental physical, spiritual and help them to become stronger by paying attention to the details as we say the devil is in the details and showing them the mechanism that can work for them personally. Because behind the generic body each of us builds differently and needs different adjustments specific to each of them. This is why feedback to each student may be important and is part of the training portion that I call ‘story-time.’
Some say “the sky is the limit” when what’s really true is that the ground is the limit and this is why I like teach ground and BJJ and Jiujutsu whats better than be locked on ground and in corner near wall to explore – Confined place.
Some time we need Risk your life to make life but training must be always safe – Today I see many Charlatans claim as formers special forces teaching un safe using load gun to teach gun disarming and Many un safe training that as former top unit in Israel I know these guys never been in any special force and maybe been soldiers but for sure never instructors as anyone that bern on service know and aware how much safety is first and last rule.
2. Reaction formation is the fixation in consciousness of an idea, affect, or desire that is opposite to a feared unconscious impulse. A mother who bears an unwanted child, for example, may react to her feelings of guilt for not wanting the child by becoming extremely solicitous and overprotective to convince both the child and herself that she is a good mother.
…of those drives. Other methods of defense include repression, a kind of withholding of conflicting ideas from recall; projection, the attribution to others of one’s own rejected tendencies; and reaction formation, turning into its opposite a tendency rejected in oneself—as in excessive generosity as a defense against avarice. The basic conflict between drives and control processes,…
Watch out from In psychoanalytic theory, reaction formation (German: Reaktionsbildung) is a defensive process (defense mechanism) in which emotions and impulses which are anxiety-producing or perceived to be unacceptable are mastered by exaggeration (hypertrophy) of the directly opposing tendency.The reaction formations belong to Level III or neurotic defense mechanisms, which also include intellectualization, dissociation, displacement and repression.
The concept of reaction formation has been used to explain responses to external threats as well as internal anxieties. In the phenomenon described as Stockholm Syndrome, a hostage or kidnap victim ‘falls in love’ with the feared and hated person who has complete power over them. Similarly paradoxical reports exist of powerless and vulnerable inmates of Nazi camps creating ‘favourites’ among the guards and even collecting objects discarded by them. The mechanism of reaction formation is often characteristic of obsessional neuroses. When this mechanism is overused, especially during the formation of the ego, it can become a permanent character trait. This is often seen in those with obsessional character and obsessive personality disorders. This does not imply that its periodic usage is always obsessional, but that it can lead to obsessional behavior.
The more you take the less you have.
What I’m looking for in a Kapap Israeli Krav Maga leader: At this point, what I look for in a self-defense instructor is a human being who knows how to exist and thrive on this planet, a spiritual warrior. He/she also needs to understand my unique point of awareness to life and have the ability to lead, but not to use it for his own ego.
Self-preservation starts within the mind. I look up to educators that not only know techniques, clear concepts of fighting and effective escapes, but who touch on philosophy and psychology of violence and conflict communication. On top of it all, they MUST be happy.
I have great respect for people who can communicate their wisdom in a way that I respect and retain. It usually goes hand-in-hand with personal experience and being AWAKE!
I always watch to see how teachers conduct themselves. I look for humility and accountability. And then, I look at GENEROSITY. This is why I set 4 levels first as eligibility into my Kapap program as most will never manage to pass this simple test first. THAT is always what makes my decision. Anything that I learn from this person will touch many lives, so I look for it to be a POSITIVE model.
I’m looking for a person who considers inner peace and balance priorities as a human being. Someone who has taken a deep long look into the dark side and not only DEALT with it, but understands it profoundly, accepts it, and responds to it in reality, without judgment.
These people are mentors, LEADERS and teach and spread the word of Kapap Israeli Krav Maga.
© Copyright 2016 Avi Nardia & Aleksandra Nardia w/Tim Boehlert